Random Inspirational Quotes

"When I was growing up I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific."

"I saw the years of my life spaced along a road in the form of telephone poles threaded together by wires. I counted one, two, three... nineteen telephone poles, and then the wires dangled into space, and try as I would, I couldn't see a single pole beyond the nineteenth."

"My life closed twice before its close; It yet remains to seeIf Immortality unveil A third event to me,So huge, so hopeless to conceive, As these that twice befell.Parting is all we know of heaven, And all we need of hell."

"True wisdom comes to each of us when we realize how little we understand about life, ourselves, and the world around us."

"If you are too busy to pray, you are busier than God wants you to be."

"Hook 'em I know how to leave them satisfied and hungry for more ~with a carefully administered shot of insulin."

"Mothers were the only ones you could depend on to tell the whole, unvarnished truth."

"It is an absurdity to believe that the Deity has human passions, and one of the lowest of human passions, a restless appetite for applause"

"Great earrings would be little speakers, so she can hear better. Or maybe she just wasn’t listening all those times I told her I loved her."

"Patriotism is a kind of religion; it is the egg from which wars are hatched."[My Uncle Sosthenes]"

"I could name my penis Steve, and it would be appropriate, as it is sort of shaped like my dad’s face, whose name is Steve. Not just his face, but his whole body and person is named Steve. And he’s a dick."

"Like success, failure is many things to many people. With Positive Mental Attitude, failure is a learning experience, a rung on the ladder, a plateau at which to get your thoughts in order and prepare to try again."

"People should be allowed to marry, and gay marriage should be out there. If a man or a woman has a good partner and they love each other with their heart and soul, let them marry. I am very much for gay marriage."

"It is man's natural sickness to believe that he possesses the truth."

"If a problem is fixable, if a situation is such that you can do something about it, then there is no need to worry. If it's not fixable, then there is no help in worrying. There is no benefit in worrying whatsoever."

"She wildly burned for the one she loved and he stood there watching, hoping he too would catch a blaze from the violence stirring in her heart."

"Faith is the poetry of our dreams; action is the builder of our reality."

"I wanted the past to go away, I wantedto leave it, like another country; I wantedmy life to close, and openlike a hinge, like a wing, like the part of the songwhere it fallsdown over the rocks: an explosion, a discovery;I wantedto hurry into the work of my life; I wanted to know,whoever I was, I wasalivefor a little while."

"When I think of all the harm [the Bible] has done, I despair of ever writing anything to equal it."

"I used to be neurotic. I didn't like myself very much. But somewhere in my mid-40s, my neuroses stopped seeming so important. I developed a sense of humor."