I’m not going to die because I failed as someone else. I’m g... - Margaret Cho

"I want Jesus to come back and say 'THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT'"-"

"It's good to be able to laugh at yourself and the problems you face in life. Sense of humor can save you."

"George Bush isn't Hitler. He could be if he applied himself."

"Sometimes the only way to deal with horrific things in life is through a dark sense of humor."