"I cry, but not for myself. There’s too much sadness in this world to waste a moment with self-pity, when making others smile will also make me smile."
"When traveling on foot through the Sahara Desert, be sure to pack several gallons of ice cream, and keep them close to your heart, because nothing, not even my love, can make that thing melt."
"I watch you like a mirror, because I see in you what I see in myself. Who we love is a reflection of who we are."
"She said she was a nurse. I replied that she must have a lot of patience—and patients. I would have said more, but I ran out of homophones."
"People won't buy study guides for a dollar, but they will pay 100 dollars for test answers. A #startup should keep this mentality in mind."
"She bats her eyelashes like I’m throwing baseballs at them. I must be as romantic as Pete Rose’s last name."