Religion isn't the cause of wars, it's the excuse. - Jasper Fforde, The Eyre Affair

"Literary detection and firearms don't really go hand in hand; pen mighter than the sword and so forth."

"Governments and fashions come and go but Jane Eyre is for all time."

"I shouldn't believe anything I say, if I were you-and that includes what I just told you."

"Take no heed of her.... She reads a lot of books."

"Don't ever call me mad, Mycroft. I'm not mad. I'm just ... well, differently moraled, that's all."