She's so small, yet she contains so much evil. - Christopher Moore, Fluke: Or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings

"As a teacher of fourth-graders in a public school, where corporal punishement was not allowed, she had years of violence stored up and was, truth be told, sort of enjoying letting it out on Kona, who she felt could have been the poster child for the failure of public education."

"There's some heinous fuckery goin' on mon."

"All killer whales are named Kevin. You knew that, right?"