More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Leadership is being the first to put others second. Wait, that’s not right. That’s politics."
"The love of my life has made me the happiest man ever. This ever-smiling man/mannequin is so happy because he’s got no brain, and in this way is identical to anyone who still rah-rahs for either a Republican or a Democrat."
"You can use your mouth to speak the words I love you, or you can use your mouth to kiss me and transport love from your mind to my heart."
"Our love, that’s real. Our currency, the dollar, that’s imaginary. Invest in us, and I promise you that you won’t lose your life’s savings."
"Our love will blend together like turquoise is blue and green. There’s no depression or envy when both blur into one."