More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I just sprayed cologne on my hand and then pet the back of my cat's head while he slept, and he woke up so confused, trying to sniff behind his neck and all around wondering what sweet attack he was under."
"The roses of romance grow when you water your relationship with gratitude. Love will bloom and blossom when you recognize the awesome."
"I spoke like a spoke on a wheel, as I went around and around without actually saying what I wanted to say. I was love flustered."
"The trick to looking ageless is drinking 55 gallons of #FlashBangWowFuzz every 4-6 hours. 24-hour discounts available."
"I’m half chameleon, half camouflage, and wholly in love with you, though you’d never be able to see it."