More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I lost interest in her because she said the wrong thing. She said nothing."
"Let’s be romantic and dance in the rain. I’ll prove my feelings for you by bringing an umbrella, because I’m drowning in my love for you."
"I should open up a dry cleaners/pizza parlor. Extra Stain Sauce will be free, but removing it out of your clothes will cost you."
"We made love like a goat has four legs like a table. If your dining room table can walk, it’s best to eat while sitting in wheelchairs."
"Love isn’t in a hurry like a flurry of flowery words on paper. It’s lush and slow to grow its aroma in the garden of time."