"Some people grow vegetables by day, but I grow shadows by night. Right now my only customer is the US government, but the profit is unbelievable."
"I loved how your cheeks had a natural rouge, like a delicate rose, and I was a rogue full of thorns. I was only a flower when I was with you."
"I don't understand people who say they need more "Me Time."What other time is there? Do these people spend part of their day in someone else's body?"
"I have a doctorate degree from the School of Hard Knocks. I studied door-to-door salesmanship. This was before the doorbell was invented."
"So many women are fighting to receive my love that Chuck Norris had to intervene, and instantly he was defeated by desire. #OutBoastKanye"
"I bleed ink for her, because her name is written on my heart. She’s the author of all the love I have to give."