More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"We made love like flamingoes are pink. You know what else was pink? My cheeks, because I was so embarrassed when I found out that she was the wrong woman."
"Be memorable. Say something unforgettable. Be silent."
"I don’t eat Sloppy Joes. I eat Tidy Josephs."
"Let’s do a 50-50 deal, with me getting 75% of the profits, and you getting the other half. That’s how we can both get the most value out of a relationship."
"Hard at work? I’ll give you a hand—my right hand. It’s a handshake, for networking and encouragement purposes. Keep it up!"