"With my last breath, I’ll exhale my love for you. I hope it’s a cold day, so you can see what you meant to me."
"Every night I cuddle with a blob of unbaked clay I fashioned in the shape of a woman. But that’s what being in love is all about."
"If I knew what you’d do, exactly when you knew what you’d do, then I’d either be you or I’d be God. And we both know I’m not you."
"Writers fish for the right words like fishermen fish for, um, whatever those aquatic creatures with fins and gills are called."
"She says he says, but she could be lying to me, and he could be lying to her, so I can’t believe her, even if I could believe her."
"I want to go to Martha’s Vineyard. I have an aunt named Martha. And an uncle by that name. Neither one is related to me."