Susan Elizabeth Phillips, Heaven, Texas

"I happen to be immature, undisciplined, and self-centered, pretty much a little boy in a man's body, although I'd appreciate it if you didn't quote me on that.-Bobby Tom"

"You couldn't be satisfied with being an amateur asshole, could you, Jimbo! You had to go and turn pro on me!"

"[Bobby Tom] finally understood Gracie's function in his life. She was God's joke on him."