"Anyway, I'm sort of glad they've got the atomic bomb invented. If there's ever another war, I'm going to sit right the hell on top of it. I'll volunteer for it, I swear to God I will."
"You can't stop a teacher when they want to do something. They just do it."
"when you're not looking, somebody'll sneak up and write "Fuck you"right under your nose."
"Grand. There's a word I really hate. It's a phony. I could puke every time I hear it."
"The more expensive a school is, the more crooks it has — I'm not kidding."
"What really knocks me out is a book that, when you're all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn't happen much, though."