"Based on the questions we both answered, we’re a 0% love match. That means we’re 100% compatible, once I enlighten her to the correct perspective on life."
"You can’t put a price tag on love. But if you could, I’d wait for it to go on sale."
"The heart pumps blood, a fluid, but it also pulses love, which is as liquid as a wave, and everyone wants a refill. My goal is to be a server."
"In a good economy, people work hard to succeed. In a bad economy, people work hard to not fail."
"As the ice melted, we fell in love—slowly. I just wish the ice were in two glasses of vodka, and not surrounding our bodies."
"One of my main regrets in life is giving considerable thought to inconsiderate people."