More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Don’t shave my head to make your wig of selfishness. Shave it because you care."
"75% of my life is spent wasting time. The other 25% isn’t nearly as productive."
"The middle finger is a great body language tool for letting people know you’re upset. Poetry isn’t quite as effective in a fit of road rage."
"I am the coffee, and God is The Barista. Through me, he may awaken your soul. But the coffee knows not what flows through the mind of The Barista."
"Love burns. Whiskey burns. George Burns. What do all three have in common? They’re all dead to me."