More quotes by Ellen DeGeneres

"Things will get easier, people's minds will change, and you should be alive to see it."
"You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me because that's how it's spelled."
"One time I actually cleaned out my closet so good I ended up on the cover of Time magazine."
"Take a nap in a fireplace and you'll sleep like a log."
"Most comedy is based on getting a laugh at somebody else's expense. And I find that that's just a form of bullying in a major way. So I want to be an example that you can be funny and be kind, and make people laugh without hurting somebody else's feelings."