For the funeral I needed a plus one, so I rented a hooker. A... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE
"For the funeral I needed a plus one, so I rented a hooker. And then I rented a movie. Rest in peace Grandpa, or whoever you were."
"For the funeral I needed a plus one, so I rented a hooker. And then I rented a movie. Rest in peace Grandpa, or whoever you were."
"Using my nipples as bait, I went fishing for compliments. I got a few bites, but nothing to write about in Field & Stream."
"I can't throw away cologne because that is Nostalgia in a Bottle, the scent of yesterday, and it reminds me of her more clearly than her picture."
"Most scars are invisible. Damn transparent knives. Does anything cut deeper than love? I need to get some new body armor."
"I love when my cat crushes his forehead into mine like my skull is an empty beer can. But it’s not—there’s still a sip left."
"The curve of her smile, the curve of the small of her back, the curve of her laugh, everything about her makes me want to be more well-rounded."