I want to scream sometimes, because I hate when people refer... - Jarod Kintz, I Want Two apply for a job at our country's largest funeral home, and then wear a suit and noose to the job interview.

"I want to scream sometimes, because I hate when people refer to a dead person as the “late” so and so. I’m sorry to break that bad news, but that person isn’t just late—they’re not even coming!"

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More quotes by Jarod Kintz, I Want Two apply for a job at our country's largest funeral home, and then wear a suit and noose to the job interview.

"I want to be a creature that’s half bee, half the letter B. That way I can pollinate the world with my literacy."
— Jarod Kintz, I Want Two apply for a job at our country's largest funeral home, and then wear a suit and noose to the job interview. Read More
"I want to read the employment section of the Bible. I think it’s simply called Job."
— Jarod Kintz, I Want Two apply for a job at our country's largest funeral home, and then wear a suit and noose to the job interview. Read More
"I want to read the employment section of the Bible. I think it’s simply called Job."
— Jarod Kintz, I Want Two apply for a job at our country's largest funeral home, and then wear a suit and noose to the job interview. Read More
"I want to say something so embarrassing about September that even the leaves start blushing and turning red."
— Jarod Kintz, I Want Two apply for a job at our country's largest funeral home, and then wear a suit and noose to the job interview. Read More
"I want to be the Everyman and take an IQ test and get a perfect 100."
— Jarod Kintz, I Want Two apply for a job at our country's largest funeral home, and then wear a suit and noose to the job interview. Read More