"If you’re going to hang around and watch me write, you might as well have a noose around your neck. Would you mind if I kicked the chair out from under your feet? You’re standing on my only place to sit."
"I just sprayed cologne on my hand and then pet the back of my cat's head while he slept, and he woke up so confused, trying to sniff behind his neck and all around wondering what sweet attack he was under."
"I’ve never been in a yesterday quite like today. Seems like the perfect time to be in love."
"I love firm hugs. Statues are so affectionate. Well, at least compared to my ex wife."
"Be mindful and heartempty, because you've got no love left in it due to you having given it all away."
"I’d rather sell one thing for one million dollars, than sell one million things for one dollar each. I feel the same about my love and women."