More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"When it’s raining, instead of using an umbrella, try holding an empty drinking glass above your head. That’s exactly how I thirst for your love."
"It’s not uncommon for me to be early to meetings by as much as a half a gallon. I guess the reason I am so punctual is because I have a very fluid concept of time."
"Sometimes I’ll forget a utensil’s name, and I’ll say, “Give me that pointy thing,” as I point with my pointy finger."
"Opportunity is not your opponent—it is your ally, but it’s hard to see that because opportunity is often camouflaged and hidden among danger and chaos."
"Her love stays with me wherever I go. That’s because I have it on a leash, like a dog, and I take it for walks like I do with my pet wheelchair."