More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I’m just going to keep plugging away until I find success—or an electrical socket that works. This is the secret to gaining worldly power."
"My hands could be considered deadly weapons. You see, I write with both of them."
"I don’t want my love with her to wither like grapes on a vine, so I’ll water it with romance to turn it into wine."
"I network like a Spanish Inquisitor. I am very good at extracting relevant information. And if you resist, you’ll only confirm your heresy."
"Myth, mist, and mystery all add to the illusion of love. If you need me I’ll be by the fog machine wearing a tunic and writing an epic poem in Greek."