More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Lightning doesn’t thunder twice. Let that be a lesson in love."
"Every politician has a promising career. Unfortunately, most of them do not keep those promises."
"I buried the lasagna, because it was better than disposing of a dead body. I’ve been burned in a relationship, but never in an oven. I’ll try harder."
"I think I’m mouth blind and that’s why all food tastes bland. The only things that have any flavor are the words I love you."
"I have two friends, Steve and Martin. But I'd happily replace both for the friendship of Steve Martin."