"She said she loved me, and I didn’t believe it for a minute. Maybe 59 seconds, but not a whole minute. I may be gullible, but I’m not without an accurate way to measure time."
"I had eggs for breakfast. I ate them off the hood of a politician’s car, after I threw them there."
"I love letting her know how much she means to me. A love in secret is but a shadow that’s cold and lonely."
"The road to hell isn't paved with gold, it's paved with faith. Faith in a dollar that's backed by a belief that people have faith in other people's belief in it."
"I don’t want to develop—I want to evelop, because it’s more positive. Similarly, would you rather your love evolve or devolve? That’s why if you need me, I’ll be on the sofa trying to evelop myself as a person."
"I don’t know what I’ll do until I know what you’ll do. I’m proactive with my preemptive reactive strategy."