"What does it mean to be the best? It means you have to be better than the number two guy. But what gratification is there in that? He's a loser—that’s why he's number two."
"Just when you thought you’d considered all the angles, life goes from a square to a cube. Love should also be 3D."
"The sunset sky fades from blue to orange over Gainesville, Florida, and what I lost is less than what I gained. I gained love, I lost love, and if could do it all again, I would."
"I'm asexual, though occasionally I'm attracted to inanimate objects. Mainly tube-shaped objects."
"Most scars are invisible. Damn transparent knives. Does anything cut deeper than love? I need to get some new body armor."
"I love deeply. I love long. I love wide and high. That's right, my love is interdimensional, and my vortex will heal your body and soul."