"You are not your body. You are the sum of all your actions, and they live on after your body dies. You may be mortal, but your brand is eternal."
"Poetic inspiration is all around us, and it surrounds us like silent music that makes our hearts vibrate. Any time you give or receive love, you are a part of a living poem."
"Knocking on a door is so violent. Instead, try talking to the door to get it to open up to you. I should write a self-help book for door-to-door salesmen."
"Why are desire scales 1-10? They should be 1-12, like a clock, because I want her 1-12, I mean like all the time."
"My ex-girlfriend was exquisite, while my current girlfriend is merely quisite. The ex always makes the past seem more excellent than the present."
"My brain is divided into two butterflies, and both are in love with your rose-shaped heart. If you've got the garden, I've got my whole life."