#Faith

"I get glimmers of the bad nineteenth-century teaching which has made Mother remove God from the realm of mystery and beauty and glory, but why do people half my age think that they don't have faith unless their faith is small and comprehensible and like a good old plastic Jesus?"

"No matter what has happened to you in the past or what is going on in your life right now, it has no power to keep you from having an amazingly good future if you will walk by faith in God. God loves you! He wants you to live with victory over sin so you can possess His promises for your life today!"

"The Written Word The only thing I hold dearer than myself(and my moms, yo') ~is the written word.I'd give my life for that bitch, (yo'.)"

"Measuring Love The only scientist who can measure love is the onewho's in love with another scientist."

"Faith never stays put. It's always challenging always questioning. That's what makes it real."

"Government Intrusion [10w] + {Couplet} America's biggest illusion is the beliefthey're free from government intrusion."

"God vs. Satan [10w] Why can't God and Satan get along?They're both detail-oriented."

"The Tigger Journals [10w] "Honestly, I'd rather be alone than with that unbearable Winnie-the-Pooh."

"I think a funny picture would have a caption that read, “Believe in yourself,” with an accompanying image of a wilting flower."

"Shine your soul with the same egoless humility as the rainbow and no matter where you go in this world or the next, love will find you, attend you, and bless you."

"Eckhart Tolle for Sociopaths The foundation for all abundance is having more cool shit than your neighbor."

"Who, Me? We marry nearly the same person over and over again,hoping next time they'll get it right."

"Diet and Exorcise [10w] The most effective diet is hanging around with fat people."

"Life Imprisonment with No Possibility of Parole [10w] "The needle is preferable to three hots and a cot."

"Let's Celebrate! Photoshop Turns 25 This Week [10w] I bought a fake passport on Fiverr.Don't tell Mexico."

"No That's Bad Aim Shoot!That ass clown couldn't hit the broad side of a barnwith the smart photon torpedohe lifted from Area 51."

"Divine Write [10w] To write is to divinely dabblein infinite alternate realities."

"Gained in Translation [10w] In timeless truths there's more gained than lost in translation."

"Men Be Forewarned! [20w] A man caught in the embrace of the wrong womanis like having his penis caught in a bear trap."

"A Voice from the Past A book is a voice from the past whispering into your ear.Sometime I get the urge to exhume the author's bodyand hit him in the head with a shovel."