#paraphrased

"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."

"Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love."

"I'm trying to undermine the basis of Christian belief... I'm not in the business of offending people. I find the books upholding certain values that I think are important, such as life is immensely valuable and this world is an extraordinarily beautiful place. We should do what we can to increase the amount of wisdom in the world.[Washington Post interview, 19 February 2001]"

"We have seen the best minds of our generation destroyed by boredom at poetry readings."

"He who hesitates is a damned fool."

"I'm a little pencil in the hand of a writing God, who is sending a love letter to the world."

"Everything must be made as simple as possible. But not simpler."

"Do not think that love in order to be genuine has to be extraordinary. What we need is to love without getting tired. Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies."

"Speak softly and employ a huge man with a crowbar."

"I have something that I call my Golden Rule. It goes something like this: 'Do unto others twenty-five percent better than you expect them to do unto you.' … The twenty-five percent is for error."

"That which does not kill us makes us stronger."

"Love is not patronizing and charity isn't about pity, it is about love. Charity and love are the same -- with charity you give love, so don't just give money but reach out your hand instead."

"Do you hate people?”“I don't hate them...I just feel better when they're not around."

"Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people."

"Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing."

"All these people talk so eloquently about getting back to good old-fashioned values. Well, as an old poop I can remember back to when we had those old-fashioned values, and I say let's get back to the good old-fashioned First Amendment of the good old-fashioned Constitution of the United States -- and to hell with the censors! Give me knowledge or give me death!"

"All persons, living and dead, are purely coincidental."

"What's in a name, anyway? That which we call a nose by any other name would still smell."

"There is no God and we are his prophets."

"If the bee disappeared off the face of the earth, man would only have four years left to live."