More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"If I told you I’ve worked hard to get where I’m at, I’d be lying, because I have no idea where I am right now."
"If you find yourself thirsting for my love, don’t forget that I sell straws in a variety of flavors. What is the price of romance? Good question. Today only it’s on sale for half-off wholesale prices. Everything must go. My entire inventory of straws is being liquidated."
"Let us embrace each other like we have the arms of two chairs. Let us dance like our legs are those of a table. We should do dinner sometime."
"I'm hanging on to her memory like Spanish moss on an ancient Florida oak, and unlike the sunset, my love won't fade."
"People don't care what I wear or don't wear, and even if I don't wear anything people will cover for me if they know that I care about them."