More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I wrote a thesis on love, and I wrote it in lipstick. Of course, I also got blood on the paper, because the lipstick was still attached to her cheating lips."
"I’ll cut jewels in the shape of crumpled-up pieces of paper. Her wedding ring may look like my 33rd attempt at my marriage vows."
"My love for you grows daily, and all it takes is exposure to your sunny disposition, coupled with watering it with coffee."
"I’m a Pisces, and people say that Pisces make the best the best lovers. That’s because Pisces are fish, and it’s like my grandpa always used to say, “The next best thing to making love to a mermaid, is having sex with a fish."
"The scent of success, it smells like body odor."