More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"A squeegee is a sponge on a stick, and if there is a tangible item that’s more romantic, I don’t know what it is. Never go on a first date without one."
"A window—it’s more entertaining than TV. Just ask a cat looking out, or a man looking in on a life he desires."
"I just bought some cargo pants, so I can deliver goods at the speed of a walk. It’s an environmentally friendly #startup."
"Everyone’s different, and in that way everyone’s the same. Stand out by sitting down. Try my love seat—it’s made for two people, so you can be comfortably obese."
"I give 110% in love. If that seems absurd, just know that I used presidential voting machines to calculate that number. It's totally legit."