I give 110% in love. If that seems absurd, just know that I... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Using my nipples as bait, I went fishing for compliments. I got a few bites, but nothing to write about in Field & Stream."

"People don't care what I wear or don't wear, and even if I don't wear anything people will cover for me if they know that I care about them."

"Though my skull is the size of a soup bowl, everything in the universe—and more—can fit inside my imagination. And guess what? My imagination tastes like chicken noodle soup."

"Trying to hide my feelings to avoid getting hurt just ends up hurting not only myself—but also the person I am hiding my feelings from."

"Knocking on a door is so violent. Instead, try talking to the door to get it to open up to you. I should write a self-help book for door-to-door salesmen."