I drink coffee like steam is the ghost of dead water. Ever t... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE
"I drink coffee like steam is the ghost of dead water. Ever tried inhaling the afterlife?"
"I drink coffee like steam is the ghost of dead water. Ever tried inhaling the afterlife?"
"A kangaroo would jump better if instead of legs, it had a trampoline under its torso. And there would be no depression, because it would bounce right back."
"She said, “I’m having the stairs rebuilt,” and I replied, “No need to get sexual with me.” I’m a bring my own elevator kind of lover anyway."
"Every day I think today could be my last day. My only fear is dying without telling her I love her one more time. All I pray for is one more time."
"I sold ten bags of hellos for five bags of goodbyes. I’d say that’s a good profit. Or it was, before I blew all my goodbyes on ex lovers."
"My knowledge is mine to use as I see fit. But I’m way too out of shape to see fit."