More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"She has a body for years, and I have an astronaut tan. When we make love it will be like (x + 2)(2x -1) = 0, solve for x."
"I count as blessings things I could have benefited from, even if I neglected to utilize them. A gift is still a gift, even if left wrapped and unopened."
"Love now, not later. Also, love later."
"I deal in the ideal idea. Buy, sell, or trade, I am offering the best prices on Love."
"My eyes are bronze, my hair is turning silver, and my heart is gold. Oh, and my love for you belongs in the Olympics, because it’s Special."