More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"To wait on love is to tie a weight on your heart and slowly drown. Why sink when you can fly by freely giving love away?"
"When you’re embarrassed, you turn red. When I blush, I turn plaid. I network at kilt conventions, so even if I say something awkward I still look cool."
"You can’t win in love. But if you could, I’d be the clear victor. Vodka is also clear, and I must be drunk."
"A turtle is like a lizard in a bicycle helmet, and I think that’s romantic. That reminds me, I should write a love song called, “Dinner for two—plus one."
"I’m late to dinner, but I’m early to being in love. I’m such a gentleman that I hold every door open—even if the guy sitting in the bathroom stall is protesting."