I was seen spotted with an older woman and a girl half my he... - Jarod Kintz, At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

"If we make it out of this alive, I’ll kill you. So you have that to look forward to."

"Sometimes I ask God what I did to deserve her love. I maintain my innocence, and of all the forms of God’s wrath from plagues, pestilence, and famine, her love is by far the cruelest."

"I want a 100% kind of relationship, and I’m willing to give it 50%."

"I still remember her meandering Mississippi kiss. I sipped it like a riverboat captain in the desert. Ah, to be young and naughtily nautical."

"Too bad Americans can’t export Awesome, because I have boxes and boxes of the stuff just lying around in my attic."