"I would argue that unless the two people are in love, all sex is bad sex, because why eat cotton candy when you can have edible clouds? Sure, it seems sweet at the time, but that’s just a carnival and carnal rush and wears off quickly. But love adds an extra dimension that takes an earthy thing like sex and makes it absolutely heavenly."
"I am an orange construction cone, and I say to you, “Caution.” This is my advice for love—and for driving while blindfolded, which is safer than love."
"As an author, I like self-help, because clapping can be done by myself, for myself. I should buy gloves."
"My heartbeat is a pulse, and it pumps out sonic vibrations that resonate with her mind as she lays her head on my chest. Listen silently and you can hear the frequency of love."
"If it’s the last kiss, we’d better make it last. I hope you don’t have anywhere to be, because I have the rest of my life free."
"I love you the way ice melts in vodka—slowly, seamlessly, and invisibly. It’s a feel-good feeling whether you see it or not."