If we amplify everything, we hear nothing. - Jon Stewart

"You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn't that long ago that we were swept away by the Macarena."

"Yes, the long war on Christianity. I pray that one day we may live in an America where Christians can worship freely! In broad daylight! Openly wearing the symbols of their religion... perhaps around their necks? And maybe -- dare I dream it? -- maybe one day there can be an openly Christian President. Or, perhaps, 43 of them. Consecutively."

"I was born with an adult head and a tiny body. Like a 'Peanuts' character."

"Get there early because hope does not park your mother-fucking car."

"Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion."