"I’m more of a journalist than anyone in the mainstream media, and I write fiction. More than fiction, I write absurd nonsense surrealism, and my work has more truth."
"Nothing carries meaning. People carry meaning. We are the porters of importance."
"I loved her as long as a midget. It was gruesome, and then I grew some."
"Combine a fog machine and a cotton candy maker to create delicious mystery. This is the heart of romance."
"I’ll wear a maze on a necklace, dangling over my chest, because if you want to get at my heart, you have to be ready to lose yourself."
"Nobody looks at what can’t look. We don’t see what doesn’t see. If love is blind, then so are we, because it’s all around us."