More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"She said, “I’m having the stairs rebuilt,” and I replied, “No need to get sexual with me.” I’m a bring my own elevator kind of lover anyway."
"Her love was too cold, like an anti-oven. That's called a freezer, and sometimes it burns food. She gave me heartburn, just like coffee, and it really woke me up to the reality of relationships."
"If someone invited you to a flash mob, would you wear a bra?"
"Behold, the number five is at hand. Grab it and shake and harness the power of networking."
"After soul searching, I found myself. Then I found myself giving of myself to a charity that finds missing children. It's great to be found."