More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"She wants to teach me to dance, but how do you instruct water to flow? I'm so fluid all you can do is swim in my moves and drink my essence."
"I have a lot of faith. I mean, I believe I do."
"I hate the smell of success, because most of the time it smells like sweat. Maybe that’s why I’m poor, because every pore on my body is dry."
"When you find yourself in hot water, what else can you do but make a spot of tea? I still have a spot of tea on my shirt from yesterday."
"She's beautiful, but so what? If the University of Florida taught me anything, it's that beautiful women are everywhere. The trick is to find the diamond among all the glittering cubic zirconias."