"My acquaintances aren’t worth the aqua I drink after they leave me thirsting for something more meaningful. I don’t want refillable relationships—I want connections so deep they are black abysses."
"I’m going to go out on a limb and say that’s the best place to hang a noose. More politicians need to be sticking their necks out for us."
"The naked truth is anything but naked. But it will be soon enough, if I keep giving it alcohol."
"My love has a flow like a flower, so it’s best if you water it with the fragrance of romance, which has the aroma of loyalty."
"The difference between you and everyone else, is everyone else. And that’s a lot, so you should feel special."
"Hoping to win the lottery to escape your existence is like waiting on a unicorn to give you a ride out of town. If you’re interested, I’m selling saddles."