More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"0 plus 100 equals 100. But so does 50 plus 50, only with more balance. Let this be a lesson in love."
"If you need me I’ll be sitting over there, on the ground, next to the empty chair. The emptiness always reminds me of your love."
"In a gust of guts and gusto, I told her of my love for her. Then, like a tornado, she spun what I said into something that terrorized Kansas."
"Vodka in the shape of a human body would be an excellent dancing partner. I'm a bring my own chaser kind of lover."
"For the funeral I needed a plus one, so I rented a hooker. And then I rented a movie. Rest in peace Grandpa, or whoever you were."