More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Lying in bed listless, I wrote a list. I then had a list, but I was still listless. Perhaps because my list was of all the things I love, and every entry was you."
"They call alcohol spirits, because it’s the spirit turned liquid. Would you drink my soul if you knew I’d use it to get inside of you? After all, most men buy women alcohol so they can get inside them too."
"A gumble bee is half gum ball, half bumble bee, and it’s so chewy it stings. Makes me want to be a better lover and tractor salesman."
"I told her I'd wait forever for her, but that was before I found somebody else who'd give me a ride home."
"I have rubbed shoulders with the rich, the powerful, and the armless. It’s how to network when handshakes aren’t an option."