More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"My shadow follows me during the day, and then surrounds me at night as it clones itself into complete darkness. Now that’s self-love."
"There's someone for everyone. And when my clones get here, everyone will be able to have that someone. Prices start at $99."
"Instead of sidewalks, why not sideruns? After all, the pace of life is faster than it has ever been, so I think our infrastructure’s nomenclature should reflect that."
"I am so extreme that I do parkour like a caterpillar gyrates. My movements are slow and methodical, but eventually my free running takes flight. I love the same exact way, and my romance has the essence of a butterfly."
"Her and I, we have a two chairs and a table kind of love. You should pull up a feeling and have a seat."