Necessity may be the mother of invention, but who is the fat... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE
"Necessity may be the mother of invention, but who is the father? Don’t look at me! I wore a condom."
More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE
"When anybody asks me what time it is, I always say, “Yesterday, plus 24 hours."
"I find out a lot about myself by sleeping. Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me."
"She said she loved me, and I didn’t believe it for a minute. Maybe 59 seconds, but not a whole minute. I may be gullible, but I’m not without an accurate way to measure time."
"Every guy says he's not like every guy, thus proving he is like every guy. Show me a guy who's different, and I'll tell you to stop pointing at me."
"My handshake is as firm as cooked spaghetti. So, do you prefer your introductions with Alfredo or marinara sauce?"