More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Networking isn’t synonymous with partying. If you’re doing it right, partying seems libraryesque in comparison."
"A turtle is like a lizard in a bicycle helmet, and I think that’s romantic. That reminds me, I should write a love song called, “Dinner for two—plus one."
"She has a body for years, and I have an astronaut tan. When we make love it will be like (x + 2)(2x -1) = 0, solve for x."
"I am a slave to your love. Well, more like indentured servant."
"I make furniture that can be used as weapons. The most dangerous piece of furniture is the Loveseat."