More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Microwavable ice cream is the future. Don’t wait for love to melt all over your crotch. Scoop some Ice Cream Soup today."
"Be mindful and heartempty, because you've got no love left in it due to you having given it all away."
"You used to love me. Let me help jog your memory by buying you some running shoes. The shoes will be wooden, and nailed to the floor."
"It's a black and white issue: gray is grey, and there's no two ways about it."
"I like grape juice. Fermented grape juice—wine. It’s the drink of choice for champions. I know because I asked a bunch of winners."