The size of your sighs tell how deeply you’re in love. How I... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE
"The size of your sighs tell how deeply you’re in love. How I feel is very much like a stressed and distressed midget trying to breathe."
More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE
"I loved her as long as a midget. It was gruesome, and then I grew some."
"When you’re embarrassed, you turn red. When I blush, I turn plaid. I network at kilt conventions, so even if I say something awkward I still look cool."
"Hoping to win the lottery to escape your existence is like waiting on a unicorn to give you a ride out of town. If you’re interested, I’m selling saddles."
"I'm sober. Yessiree, I quit drinking. I haven't had a beer in four hours. Now I just need some coffee and to get drunk on love poetry."
"I need to be gentler, I said definitively to myself, as I clenched my fist and shook it in the air. Love takes flight like two powerful wings, but hits like a collection of feathers."