When you're here, I'm there for you. And when you're there,... - Jarod Kintz, Whenever You're Gone, I'm Here For You

"I don’t mind waiting rooms. I’m waiting on the love of my life, so I may as well have a seat, right?"

"When you're here, I'm there for you. And when you're there, I'm here for you."

"When the silent flamingo dances pink with desire, I’ll be there, sipping on owl stares and kitten curls."

"I’m not a very good sleeper. But you know what? I’m willing to put in a few extra hours every day to get better. That’s just the kind of hard worker I am."

"Couples should be able to share their dreams with one another. That’s why for just $69.69, you’ll like what I have to sell you. It’s not just one tube and two suction cups you each attach to your foreheads—it’s the Dream Tunnel."