Jarod Kintz, Whenever You're Gone, I'm Here For You

"To me, impulsive means foolish. But if a person’s not a little impulsive, they don’t have a pulse."

"It’s easier to hide your smoking habit on a foggy day. Let that be a lesson for you and your secret lover."

"My love is expansive. Your love is expensive."

"Couples should be able to share their dreams with one another. That’s why for just $69.69, you’ll like what I have to sell you. It’s not just one tube and two suction cups you each attach to your foreheads—it’s the Dream Tunnel."

"When you're here, I'm there for you. And when you're there, I'm here for you."

"My love is expansive. Your love is expensive."

"My love is expansive. Your love is expensive."

"I don’t mind waiting rooms. I’m waiting on the love of my life, so I may as well have a seat, right?"

"My love is expansive. Your love is expensive."

"I’m not a very good sleeper. But you know what? I’m willing to put in a few extra hours every day to get better. That’s just the kind of hard worker I am."

"I’m not a very good sleeper. But you know what? I’m willing to put in a few extra hours every day to get better. That’s just the kind of hard worker I am."

"To me, impulsive means foolish. But if a person’s not a little impulsive, they don’t have a pulse."

"When you're here, I'm there for you. And when you're there, I'm here for you."

"To be the only one who knows is lonely. No wonder Solomon, the wisest man, needed 900 concubines."

"Success breeds slackery. And I breed in the backery of the bakery."

"I don’t mind waiting rooms. I’m waiting on the love of my life, so I may as well have a seat, right?"

"When you're here, I'm there for you. And when you're there, I'm here for you."

"I’m not a very good sleeper. But you know what? I’m willing to put in a few extra hours every day to get better. That’s just the kind of hard worker I am."

"When the silent flamingo dances pink with desire, I’ll be there, sipping on owl stares and kitten curls."

"My love is expansive. Your love is expensive."